Don’t worry………this post is not going to be a long detailed confessional. Just let me say that I have done things that I regret. Some were honest mistakes, some were disagreements, some were bursts of anger, and a few were just plain old fashioned evil. Like it or not, this is true for all of us.
We all do things that are wrong………..and sometimes we do things that are straight up evil.
Some of our misdeeds we justify. We decide that they were wrong…….but that they were worth it. Some of them we recategorize………we simply decide that they weren’t wrong after all. We are very good at this. We take something that is wrong, but that we really enjoy, want, or even need. We redefine it as OK ……and from them on we can enjoy it free from guilt. This, of course, is dishonest…….and the most destructive lie……is the one you tell yourself. There are those among us who have carried this to the point where just about anything that they want is OK. “If it feels good do it!” We call this hedonism.
But, for most of us, when we do something wrong, we know it’s wrong and we feel an unusual type of pain…….guilt. Guilt is not very popular in our culture. We are continually told that we should be tolerant……..and when you come down to it, guilt is just intolerance that we have turned inward. This attitude toward tolerance and guilt is something that our culture has gotten wrong. Tolerance can be a good thing…….but it can also be bad. It all depends on just exactly what it is that you are tolerating. Tolerating harmless annoyances from our neighbors is good. Tolerating Hitler in the 30’s was bad. It all depends on where the thing that you are tolerating is leading you.
Same story with guilt. Guilt can be good or bad……..depending on where it leads you. Guilt that leads you to abandon behavior that hurts others or yourself is good. Guilt that leads you to improve the way you treat others is good. Guilt that keeps you stuck in a bad place is bad. Guilt over something that you cannot undo and cannot learn and grow from is bad.
Good guilt is a gift from God. It causes you to examine the mistake that you have made, to learn from it and to grow. It can also lead you to make amends and help others heal.
So, if you are feeling guilty about something that you have done, you need to have a good hard look at the situation….perhaps share it with somebody wise. You must see if you can learn from it and grow, or help others to grow from it. If you can, then you are dealing with Godly guilt and you should pray about it and act on it. If you can’t learn from it, grow from it, or help others because if it, then you are dealing with destructive guilt…….confess it, then drop it and move on. Bad guilt has a way of dragging you down into more bad decisions.
Guilt is just like any other form of pain. If the pain causes you to pull your hand out of the fire, it is good. If the pain doesn’t cause you to act to improve the situation, then it is counterproductive.
For you became sorrowful as God intended and so were not harmed in any way by us. Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death.
Paul, NIV
Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you a free from the law of sin and death.
Paul, NIV